What is Ethical Blackmail?
Recently, I was asked to explain more about Ethical Blackmail. I thought this would be the perfect opportunity for my first blog post.
When people think of Blackmail it typically involves criminal activity or abuse. People describe this type of treatment as feeling like there is no escape, it is frightening and traumatic. They often feel alone, helpless and this can have an effect on their mental and physical wellbeing. Those who chose victims use it as a tool to manipulate and gain control over others.
Within the kink community there is a subculture that values this loss of control. In this realm called Ethical Blackmail it is a consensual dynamic where the submissive partner willingly gives control to their dominant partner.
While it may seem odd to some, it creates a scenario in which the submissive partner feels safe and secure. The Submissive knows that the information the dominant partner holds is in trusted hands and would not be used maliciously outside of the scene. This can be deeply arousing for some.
The ability to explore freely a darker side of desires with a dominant partner in a secure space without guilt, shame or judgement is important for all Submissive’s.
When approaching a potential Domme to explore this type of activity remember to be respectful, speak about both of your boundaries and have your goals prepared. I will include a few tips below.
Ultimately¸ Ethical Blackmail allows for a non-destructive way for people to engage in the thrill of blackmail in a consensual space. That space could be online, in person or on the phone. The possibilities in this role playing are endless.
Tips on what you can prepare beforehand when discussing a scene with a Professional Domme:
Your Domme wants to know why this appeals to you. Think of some points you can tell your Domme about why this kink is something you wish to explore.
Talk about your goals in the scene. Your Domme wants to make sure you feel exactly how you desire. She wants to create the perfect scene catered to you. For example, do you wish to feel scared, ashamed or made to do certain things?
Know the tools she can use to control you. Pictures, details of your life that provide resources that can be used against you and tasks you can be assigned all provide a great way for someone to manipulate you to their will.
Consider how you want to enact this treatment and how that aligns with your Domme’s expectations. You may need to discuss an hourly rate for texting, videochat or in person booking.
If Financial Blackmail is at play make sure you discuss in advance a budget and the length of the commitment as an hourly rate may not apply in this dynamic.
